Off to an enchanted place

These days, it takes me about 1-2 hours lying in bed thinking before I slowly drift to sleep. I don't really think its me being nocturnal. More to the point, I feel its because I've had a lot to think about recently. Family, work, research work, friends who have problems at the moment, friends who I thought were friends but have disappeared from the face of the earth... Often, this enchanted world of thoughts will lead me to some sort of depression or homesickness just before I sleep. Yet, when I wake up in the morning it all goes away. I take a deep breath and tell myself its a brand new day. As I brush my teeth, I will think to myself 'I wonder what will happen today.' Often surprises will come my way during a day - sometimes they are subtle, sometimes they are obvious.

I was going to dread work today. I admit that I failed to try and think positive. I didn't even bother to listen to my happy music in the morning on the way to work. Standing around Town Hall all day in a job fair for 9 hours wasn't my idea of a bed of roses. But I kind of met a God-sent 'guardian angel' during the fair. I got talking to a guy working for Barclays Bank and I was telling him about my concerns that I might not get a job even with a BMus, PhD and BSc. But he made me think out of the box. I don't have to stick to music. My PhD teaches me far more skills other than music. My BSc prepares me to think outside the world of music. Its up to me as to how I want to utilise not just my certificates but the skills I've acquired all these years. It filled me with hope that i'm not going down a dead-end road. I will get a job that I like and thrive in it. It might not be music related but it won't stop me from teaching privately as a hobby.

I've learnt that everyday there is someone or something waiting out there to teach you something new about life. And its up to you to spot that sign/person or not. Its also up to you to act upon it and take it as something positive in life. Proko met his 'angel' today too. Ask him and he might tell you about it too.

The next few months might not be easy for me - a lot of research to carry out, R might be sent out of Birmingham for a few months for work, going home for a month and having to face leaving Singapore again... But, I have to remember that there is a very bright light at the end of the tunnel, and no, the light will not be the headlamp of an oncoming train.